When you can't keep them in school...

What happens when other parents and families are aware of one child's behavior, and are alarmed at what that child does both in and out of school? What if a family or families declares that this particular child MUST go? How does a program respond?

Many programs might find this incentive enough to ask the child's family to leave. This happens all the time.

Imagine that a child has some supports from the county, has a special education teacher coming into the classroom to coach prosocial behavior and speech, using the usual techniques, charts, stars, etc. and still that child has extreme episodes of violent behavior, usually precipitated by an anxiety-provoking situation (for him/her). Teachers can have their eye on that child, providing unusually time-consuming supervision and support above and beyond what one might expect in a program that does not have special needs personnel onsite. The child might be getting help off-site as well, and teachers can see some of the effects of this help, but it simply isn't enough to ward off a sudden, violent explosion that could hurt or harm someone.

The parents can call an emergency meeting of the IEP team. The school system can send a psychologist to observe. The preschool director can get involved in pushing the public school to accept the child, who is in crisis. A placement can be found in the public school special education program. This can be exactly what the child needs, and without throwing the family out without recourse. The current program should celebrate the child's last day, and the children who remain should be be allowed to discuss how they feel about the departure of their fellow student.

This is not expulsion. It is a successful transition for a child who needs more than a typical program can give.  The child is not rejected because of the complaints of others, nor by complaints by an overworked staff. The child is calmly transitioned, the family on board with the decision. The child is prepared by thoughtful adult "reframing" ("You are going to a new school!").

This way of giving a child and family a way through a trying situation to a better place is the result of reflective practice, hard work, and insistence on doing the right thing for the right reason. Thus a child receives the care he/she needs. And the learning community remains whole.

Keeping Kids in School

I presented two workshops yesterday, one on challenging behavior, at the 15th Annual Regional Child Care and Early Childhood Conference at Germanna Community College yesterday morning (early morning!). I didn't call it Challenging Behavior, but "Keeping Kids in School". It was my response to two facts. One: I have worked in preschools and child care for over twenty-five years (after singing opera and concerts for many more years). There was always at least one child who pushed the boundaries of civilized behavior in an already uncivilized environment (from the average adult's point of view). Four year olds, bless 'em, are notorious for both bottomless joy and rowdy behavior, but even among them, there are standouts for aggression, dangerous behavior, and being generally ungovernable. Two: Finally, there is some recognition of the awful fact that four year olds, especially boys, and particularly  minority boys, are expelled at an alarming rate. They are the most expelled of all ages. I kid you not! The federal government has issued a policy statement spelling this out, and making recommendations for reversing this trend. Dr. Walter Gilliam has written extensively about it, and I used this article for part of my presentation.


Here is what I told this group of childcare professionals, in a nutshell.

• Preschoolers should not be expelled. 
• There are ample resources for helping children. 
• Relationships are key, from the earliest age.
• Engaging curriculum is essential.
• Using what is known about guiding behavior is also crucial.
• Assessment that is specific and detailed must precede interventions. 

I included references here so that you may, at your leisure, read the reasons for my statements. I defer to the experts! 

What I emphasized was my own experience working in a center that supports a team approach, and with a supportive, involved director. I asked people to discuss how they can work towards a team approach, where all stakeholders interact with a child with problems in the same, informed way: Structure that is firm and therefore safe for everyone; Uniform interaction with that child, using the same strategies, filling the child up with love and attention when he or she is doing what you want! What I heard was this:

"In my center we have a boy who is out of control a lot. I try to work with him in a calm, non-threatening way, but when I'm on break, A sub comes in and yells at him, blaming him for everything that happens, even when it isn't his fault. When other children tattle on him, the subs take their sides, without learning the details. Then when I come back to the classroom, my director says she heard that this boy was out of control, and she blames me."

I asked if the center staff had training in behavior management. Her answer was this: 

"We all did Conscious Discipline Training. But most people don't do it. They forgot what they learned."

Here we have the crux of an ongoing problem! In most programs, training is for fulfilling state-mandated training hours. This director actually sent her staff to training together, but there was no follow-up. The center director should have worked with her staff to implement what they learned. She should have asked for feedback on how the teachers were using the strategies. She did not. Training is time and money wasted if there is no follow-up. The child continues to ambush his own learning, and no one knows what to do about it.

What I liked about the Child Care Connection conference was that all participants could earn extra training hours, beyond those they earned by attending, just by implementing something they learned, writing it up, and submitting it. Voila! This is what the director mentioned earlier should have done! "Tell me how you are using that training I paid for (lol)!" Show me! I will give you extra training hours for that. You will be recognized for learning, then applying your learning. 

How much more confident and motivated caregivers would be, if their learning were taken seriously.